Monday, April 25

The Truths about Parenting PART 1

*I must start with a warning so to say.  There are many different views on parenting.  This post is about mine.  I'm not wanting anyone to get offended, I'm just venting...

Truth #1: Parenting is tough!
Do we ever admit this?  I'm quilty of being one of those moms who always post the cutest pictures and videos and always talks so positively about my responsibilites as a stay at home mom.  I, mean, E is awfully cute.  Right now she's on her tummy in the living room looking at the big overstuffed chair saying "hi"  (more like..haui) over and over.  But, she's not always happy.  She cries and tries my patience.  So why do I always try and convice people that I am SO happy that I stay at home w/ E?  Well, part of it is because I am...usually.  Also, for me, personally, I feel like I have to prove myself.  This probably isn't the best thing.  BUT, in our society, stay at home moms are not looked at in positive ways.  I have to remind myself OFTEN that what I'm doing is more important than bringing in an extra couple thousands of dollars a month.  We survive on one (small) paycheck, and we don't have any debt.  Yeah, we have a hand me down table, no tv and cable, and used couches that I don't particularly like, but my happiness doesn't come from those things. 

I'll admit that there ARE times when I look at the world and wonder if this is so right why do "they" look happier?  Again, I have to remind myself OFTEN that what I am doing is making a difference.  There is so much darkness in the world right now.  The world needs BETTER parents.  (You do not have to be a stay at home mom to be a better parent by the way.  I have several AWESOME friends who have to work.  That's not what I'm saying.)  With Will's job, we've seen how important parenting is.  I wish more children could have a MOM & DAD who LOVE each other and who are ready to be parents.  There are TOO many 17 year old moms!  It's almost normal!  YIKES!  I'm so glad that I can stay at home with Evelyn and let her know that she is loved and cared for.  I'm glad that I can be the one to teach her values and standards and not some government program. 

So, there you have it...parenting is tough!  Not just because I have no clue what I'm doing and because I don't know how to always make E stop crying, but because the world has made it tough! 

Now you mom's out there, what have you done to make it easier?  What has helped you feel that what you are doing is the Lord's will?

4 comments:

Courtney said...

http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?autoplay=true&index=1&locale=0&sourceId=852721bf16a89210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=bd163ca6e9aa3210VgnVCM1000003a94610aRCRD

This is a video that helps me realize the importance of what I'm doing. It is a nice reminder not to get down on myself and even though I'm not perfect, I'm doing a good job:)

Mom said...

It is harder to be a stay at home mom than any other job!!! I am sorry I am not in IF this week to be a venting board. When the weather improves life will look a little better. You have a daughter with both your strengths and weaknesses and she will, and has, quickly figured out how to push your buttons. There has never been a book printed that truly prepares you for parenthood; I don't care what we are taught in church. Each child is different, you figure out what works for one kid and it is all wrong for the next one. Just don't beat your self up for the times you wish things were different. You will have TOUGH days!

Jill said...

THis is One big Fat AMEN! You are amazing Sandy and probably do all the things I am going to share with you, but just know that it is tough, but the toughness of it all rubs off all our rough edges and makes us smooth polished stones. That;s what I tell myself. I'm jut getting more polished, just a little more smooth....
THe single most important thing I do every day for myself and my family is have personal scripture study. It is THE difference
I vent in a journal
I talk to other moms all the time
Go to the temple often.
Study parenting books and come up with my own philosophies.
PRAYER in my heart ALL day long

Faith in Every SINGLE Foot STEP

Before I react, I stop and pray
Find ways to laugh...like days when I get pooped on, puked on, peed on, and nose blown on, just laugh...this is so disgusting just laugh...
books I recommend for parenting:
Emotion Coaching by Gottman
Raising the Fussy, High Maintenance baby by William Sears
Baby Wise by I don't remember
Baby Whisperer by Tracy Hogg

Good Luck

Tara said...

So true. It's way hard! Thanks for posting this!

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