What is Important

I am grateful for trials because they remind you to take a step back and think about what's important.  I'm especially grateful that this latest trial we are having has happened at this time.  You've probably heard that Evelyn broke her collar bone today.  It's heartbreaking to hear her cry because of the pain she has.

She is usually a great sleeper, but right now it's 11:00pm and Will and I have been taking turns trying to get her to sleep for the last hour.  (We got her to sleep at 7pm by driving around in the car looking at Christmas lights.  We left her in her car seat to help hold her body still but put her in her room for bed. However she moves around a lot in her sleep, and most likely woke up because she couldn't move as she was in her car seat.)

Anyway, why am I grateful that I am going through such a hard time?  I have realized that this is a hard thing to go through, but I still have the opportunity to raise Evelyn.  She was injured, but it is only temporary.  In a few weeks, this will all be a dream.  Aside from the broken bone, she is still healthy.  I still get to hold her in my arms and give her kisses.  While many people are dreaming of presents this time of year and getting sidetracked by the real meaning of Christmas, I am grateful for this trial as all day today I have been thinking of my Heavenly Father and what He must have gone through as His Only Begotten Son atoned for our sins in the Garden of Gethsemane and as He later had to watch His perfect Son die on the cross.  This trial has helped remind me of my Savior and how grateful I am for His atonement.  I know he understands the things we are going through.  He atoned for us to satisfy the demands of justice, and to provide a way for us to be forgiven of our sins.  But, it was much more than that.  He also felt our pains and sorrows.  I have found strength as I have looked to him for comfort during this trial and all the other trials I have faced in my life. 
So, this Christmas, I'll probably end up getting Evelyn way more presents than we had even actually planned on to try and make up for her misery, but I will also try to forget about my vain desires and wants and remember how to be more like my Savior.
Here's a good video to help you remember. :)
http://lds.org/bible-videos/videos/shepherds-learn-of-the-birth-of-christ?lang=eng

Evelyn Moments

Evelyn makes me smile....a lot.  She is SO goofy.  I wish I could remember all the silly things she does or at least get pictures and videos of them all, but then I would probably be constantly filming. :)  Here is a recent moment that made me smile.

Evelyn learned to give kisses awhile ago.  She was very generous at first.  I'd ask for a kiss and she'd open her mouth and lean in towards mine.  It was well...wet...but adorable.  We must have over asked for them, because after awhile she started to turn away when we asked for them.  Then she started to only give them to me for awhile and always turn away from Will.  Then she switched on us and started to give Will the kisses.  Well, she still has her "moments" but overall she is willing to share her adorable kisses. 

Evelyn also loves to play with the book shelf.  We have a few books on a shelf that she can reach and she seems to always be taking them down.  One of these books happens to be by Dave Ramsey.  It looks like this:

She pulled this one down the other day and gave Dave Ramsey a nice big kiss.  Will was watching her as she did it and grabbed the book and sure enough, there was a nice wet mark right over his lips.  :) 

I won't complain

So, it turns out, it does get cold in Oklahoma. I won't complain though, because my ID friends had some negative weather already.  But, brrr...I'm cold.  I need to put more plastic up around our windows because we're still getting a lot of cold air coming in.  IT'S just TOO WINDY!  Any other tips?
Well, we are alive and well.  My computer has been down, so I haven't had much computer time, but Will went to bed early tonight as he is hoping to fight off a cold.  So, I decided to give my fans a modest update.  Let's see.  I'll just talk about Thanksgiving.  Will and I split a groupon deal with some of our friends here.  They found a resort in Branson that had a pretty good deal, especially when you split it between 3 families.  So we all shared a 3 bedroom condo type apartment on the lake in Branson.  It was a very relaxing getaway  Well except for the first couple hours.  We stopped in Joplin on our way to Branson, as it was en-route and drove through the town to see what an F5 tornado could do.  DEPRESSING!  It had been 6 months from the day that the tornado hit, and wow, the destruction that was still left to behold even after all the cleanup that has already been done was immense.   We stopped and tried to have lunch across from the hospital that was destroyed.  They built a new park in honor of that day.  It was nice, but we didn't stay long, one it was too cold to enjoy our lunch, and two they were setting up for a anniversary event that was to be held later.  So off we went to Branson.  Joplin was a good way to start off my Thanksgiving Holiday.  It made me realize how blessed I am.  It also showed me what was truly important.  If I were to loose everything, would I still be happy? 

Well we were in Branson for two days and then We continued our journey an hour and a half south to my home town to have Thanksgiving Dinner with my Grandparents.  We spent the night with them and returned home on Friday.  I'll have pictures to show next time.  Meanwhile here is a list of things I'm grateful for:

1. My Eternal Family
2. My Sweet Husband that does so much for me
3. My beautiful baby girl who makes me so happy
4. My sister who is so patient with me
5. All of my wonderful friends who always have something to teach me or help me
6. The time in which we live.  I love being able to be so connected with so many people.  I used to think that I was born in the wrong era, but I've realized that I love how information is so accessible and how we can go to so many places so quickly.  Two of my favorite things are traveling and learning!
7. I love the scriptures.  They fill me with peace.
8. I love my warm bed and my comfy pillow. :)
9. I love this time of year and all the thinking of others that goes on
10. I am grateful that I can stay at home with Evelyn.  Sometimes I wonder if it's worth it, as you can find some great day cares out there, but then when she does something that makes me die of laughter or smiles at me with her toothy grin I remember how lucky I am.
11. I'm grateful for my Savior.  Which is why Christmas is one of my favorite holidays!  
12. I'm grateful for diversity. It reminds me to think of others.  I was at Walmart the other day and saw a Muslim women shopping.  It hit me, she isn't celebrating Christmas.  It was such a foreign thought.  The town I grew up in was 100% Christian.  I knew one JW and even they were Christian, they just didn't celebrate Christmas.  That has changed by now, but yeah...It was a good reminder that there are a lot of people who think and feel differently than me.  We can learn a lot from each other and in deed I have learned a lot from people who think differently.  
13. I'm grateful that you read all the way through.  I'm grateful for so many things, but I'll call it a night for now. :)

Survey Savvy

So, I might be a stay at home mom full time, but I have found some side jobs.  My new thing is giving my mind over to science.  I love living in a BIG college town.  I also loved living in a SMALL college town.  Rexburg had its perks, but Norman has some too!  In a BIG college town, the school focuses on research and that means sometimes they need research participants.  In comes me.  A few weeks ago, my awesome friend told me about a memory study that she did that only took an hour and she got $20! UM..AWESOME!  So, I set up an appointment and swapped babysitting with another friend so she could do the study after me.  I stared at a computer and clicked the right mouse button every time I saw one picture and the left mouse button when I saw another.  It got boring after awhile.  (They did throw things in to change it up and make it more difficult, but yeah it was the easiest $20 I ever got.)  Then Will got an email from a psychology teacher in his building looking for students to participate in another memory study.  This one is INTENSE!  I don't get paid as much.  I get $8 an hour and I'm supposed to do 4 hours.  I'm usually only in there for 45 minutes for each session though, and they round up the time, so that is nice. The intense thing about this study is I wear a brain imaging net!  It looks similar to this. 

This study is collecting data and audio and visual response in the brain.  All I have to do is look at the computer and every time I see one image or hear one particular sound, I'm supposed to click the left button.  They can be together or by themselves.  The visual image is hard to see and they will have it displayed for only a second and the brightness changes too.  The volume for the sound also changes.  There is a separate but similar picture and sound that whenever I see or hear I'm supposed to click the other button. It's actually quite hard because the images are so similar and I only see them for a second.  Anyway, I have been doing this study in the morning before Will goes to school, so he stays home with Evelyn.  I have two more days left of this study.
Another awesome SURVEY I did was at the grocery store!  I just had to answer a few questions about a new meat product, and I got a $20 gift card to the store!
Next, a few months ago the State Fair was going on.  I went with my dear friend Amanda.  While we were walking around, we entered the Car Show area and found a Ford dealer telling us about a way to get $50 for just test driving a car.  So, naturally we signed up.  Later, Will and I went on  a date to test drive a car a few weeks ago. :)  We're so romantic.  Anyway, we get to the Ford dealership and we feel like dorks, because we're really not interested in buying a car right now.  We told the guy that we'd probably be looking for a bigger car in a couple years, but not anytime soon.  So, he's like, well let me just sign the paper for the $ then.  If you test drive a car now and get all excited about one, then when you want to buy it, it will be completely outdated, so basically it will be a waste of our time.  (It was also a waste of his time...but he didn't say that.) :)  So, we were only there for a couple of awkward minutes.  But instead of spending any money on our "date" we got paid!  We're awesome.  (Don't worry that wasn't all we did on our date.)

 At the fair.  They had a bubble mania thing.  It was FUN!

 There was also a petting zoo!  It was pretty cool.  They had a zebra and a kangaroo and a few other random animals I would have never expected too see.

Finally, last week was OU's Homecoming.  We decided to take Evelyn to the parade.  We started to walk around afterwards and ended up at the family fun zone they do for free every game.  We got some little free things, but nothing that exciting.  As we left the "fun zone" we walked by the fitness training center and saw a bunch of people walking in and out.  We thought we'd check it out, but noticed they all had wristbands on.  So we commented about it to each other and someone overheard us and gave us their extra wristbands.  Turns out there was about 20 different food vendors giving away food to Season Ticket Holders or donators or something.  (We're still not sure on who got the wristbands...)  But, we got LOTS of Yummy food!  It was amazing.  I was pretty happy about that. So, there you have our money making ways.  I love life.  It's grand. Enjoy some pictures of our crazy life.  

Evelyn meeting Boomer & Sooner, the OU Mascot!

Evelyn hanging out on the Sooner Schooner.  (Schooner is the name for a covered wagon.)

After the parade, we saw the band relaxing.  We thought she'd love the sousaphone.  She seriously did!  She was just hamming it up for the camera.  The Band members loved her.  Seriously she knows how to smile for the camera.  It's amazing!

The crazy crowd.  People are everywhere.  This picture doesn't do it justice.

P.S. This happened to be the game that OU lost.  SADDEST DAY EVER!  Yes, I'm a football fan now.  But, I still love my Sooners and they will still do some great things this year!  They may not be the greatest team in the nation, but they are pretty good.  Also, don't you think it's AWESOME that Oklahoma has 2 Teams in the top 10!  What other state can say that.  More Proof that  OKLAHOMA IS GRAND!

Our blog is growing

Will decided to create a new blog for our rants and for our thoughts on life and such.  Here's the link.

http://lifeaswillandsandraseeit.blogspot.com/

A little about me...

So first of all, thanks for all of the support on my last post.  It was great to hear how much I have in common with many of my friends.  Aside from the little personal struggles that everyone seems to have, overall, life here in OK is GRAND!  We love it.  We love our new friends too.  Will has midterms this week, so he is pretty stressed out.  I've been volunteering for Just Between Friends in the evenings this week, so instead of spending time with me he can study.  He is usually really good about coming home and spending time with me in the evenings.  It's not like I don't like spending time with him.  :) He needs the extra time to study though, so I'm glad I can be doing something fun, while he is doing something...shall I say...fun?  

Many of you know that  I have had leg problems.  In my past, I've usually hidden it or acted like it didn't exist, not because I was embarrassed or ashamed, but because I didn't think it hindered me at all.  Well, I'm finally admitting to myself that it has become a problem and am seeing a physical therapist.  My first appointment with him was well concerning.  He kept saying things like interesting, and oh wow, and hmm...but I have confidence in myself and know that I can improve.  This isn't at all where my post was supposed to go, but this is where my typing took me, so I'll stick with it.  I'll share my leg story because I'm sure you are so interested.  Actually, I love hearing about medical things, so maybe you do too. 

I was born with hip and knee problems.  I'm not too sure on this because I never thought about asking my mom, until it was too late to ask her.  The only thing she says about it in her journal is that I was born with a knee problem and I had to have several surgeries and I have a few different pictures of me wearing a full lower body cast on my legs when I would have much rather have been crawling or walking.  My grandma t. always told me that my leg was wrapped around my sisters neck when I was born, but that doesn't explain all the surgeries I've had.  My grandma m. informed me after we were talking about my confusion that I was born with out a hip socket or something like that.  After doing some online research I've learned that hip problems are more common than I would have ever realized, especially in girls.  It can be genetic, but I'm assuming mine had more to do with me being a twin and breeched and stuff like that.  I'm not sure though.  At any rate, I've also learned that a procedure to correct this is to take bone from the patella (knee) to recreate the hip bone.  So, that would explain the scars on my knee.  Anyway, apparently, I had several surgeries when I was a baby to correct this problem.  Well, as I grew older, my right leg began to grow shorter.  Walking in that condition caused some problems as well.  When I was in first grade, I was referred to Shriners Hospital and they put a lift on my shoe to temporarily fix the problem until I was 11 and they lengthened my leg.  If you want to read more about that you can go here.   That is when I had my first experience with Physical Therapy.  I remember having fun, but also being in a lot of pain.  I remember one older guy probably in his late teens complaining and some of the staff telling him to act more like me. :)  I guess I was a tough cookie.  :)  Anyway, after that, I just assumed everything was going to be ok.  I went to my checkups every year until I turned 18.  They always seemed so positive.  My leg was still a couple cm. shorter and I couldn't get my leg all the way straight in the knee area, but kids only think about the present, so needless to say I wasn't worried.  I could still walk & run...although I ran a little bit weird.  (Some guy who I dated in college once told me that I ran cute. I was really confused and didn't know what to think about him.  I didn't know I ran weird until then.)  Anyway, I was never really worried.  I would have some issues, but nothing that caused me concern.  It wasn't until I was pregnant that I started to wonder if I would have any problems giving birth and possibly later in life.  Will loves physical therapy and at one point was planning on being one.  So, for the last 3 years, he would tell me pretty regularly that I should see a physical therapist.  He even emailed a teacher on campus who had experience in physical therapy some questions about me.  The teacher wanted to meet up with me, but I never did go visit him.  Well, my pregnancy went ok.  My hip got tired pretty quickly, but it wasn't bad.  Even now, it's not that big of a deal.  But, two things made me realize I would need some help.  In IF we had to do our dishes by hand and only after a couple minutes of standing at the sink my hip would start burning.  I began to worry more when after I would put Evelyn in the baby carrier my hip would start to hurt after a couple minutes.  I even bought a really nice fancy baby carrier that is supposed to be good on your back and hips, but still pain.  So, I began to do some research and finally made the appointment.   They have some really interesting techniques to help strengthen my leg.  Some are not fun, but others are pretty cool. I often wonder how they ever thought of some things.  Anyway, it's been an interesting experience these last few weeks.  I didn't realize how weak I had let my hip become.  I'm reliving a lot of memories I haven't thought about since I was 11.  I'm getting x-rays tomorrow and I keep thinking about all the times I got x-rays when I was 11.  I loved getting xrays.  My grandpa and I would go to the room and they would have all kinds of fun things to do while you waited.  The techs were so fun.  Anyway, wish me luck on this new experience.  Sorry if this was really boring.  This is just something that has been on my mind and I guess I needed to share it, because that's what my fingers started doing.  :)

Brave Girls

Ok, I've been meaning to write this for a long time, but well this isn't easy to write so I haven't.  :)  A new friend of mine in OK wrote about her struggle with depression, so I thought I'd join her.  Here's my story. 
Because I am weak, I have to start at the very beginning.  My parents divorced when I was young.  I grew up with my grandparents and was a twin, and therefore always felt a little different and I'll even admit I was embarrassed by my grandparents at times.  I love them to death, but let me put it this way--my Grandma is the modern day Mrs. Bennett from Pride and Prejudice.  Not only is she obsessed with marriage, she's just as crazy as Mrs. Bennett.  I mean that in the nicest way possible.  She's crazy.  I'm crazy...so yeah. You know that phase every adolescent goes through where they think everyone is watching them?  Well that period was especially difficult for me because I felt so different.  All the surgeries and scars on my legs didn't help either (I've had more surgeries than I can count to fix a leg problem I had at birth).  Then when life was getting good and we moved back to live with my mom, she passed away.  I moved right back to Arkansas and started my second semester of 6th grade.  Why is this information important?  I mentioned I am weak.  I feel like I have to defend my depression.  So here is my defense.  Studies have shown that female children who experience early life stress are more prone to depression.  I personally don't look back on my early life and think negatively.  I had a great childhood.  I was VERY happy.  I was LOVED.
Now to the story:  If you knew me in high school or college, you probably thought I was happy and outgoing.  I was.  I thought I had a great life.  I did miss my mom a lot and was very self conscious about myself, but life was great.  I had small bouts of depression, but I kept myself too busy in college to fall in any major dark holes.  There were times where I'd lock myself in the bathroom and cry.  I don't remember why.  But, I wouldn't consider myself depressed at that point.  I didn't really believe in mental illness either.  I just thought maybe I wasn't being spiritual enough.  If I did better in my scripture study or prayers, I'd be better.   I'd do better and I'd feel better. My depression didn't really hit me until I got engaged.  I went to a counselor and she assured me that it was just all the stress I was going through.  It was my last year of college.  I was planning a wedding..blah...blah...blah. I believed her and thought it would go away.  Then I got married.  Life was great for a few months and then I started student teaching (when Will read through this he informed me that I was depressed before student teaching began).  I fell into a dark hole.  I was miserable.  Will was a trooper.  He was studying psychology at the time and was probably trying to do all types of experiments on me.  I went to see another counselor.  This guy wasn't much help either.  He basically said the same thing as the first.

"You've never really struggled with depression.  You were happy in the past.  You're just going through some big changes.  You're a newly wed and student teaching.  My wife is a teacher,"

and I kid you not, he told me that he thinks most teachers are on anti-depressants anyway.  So, once again, I thought it was just a very dark funk.  I don't know how I survived. I hated life.  I felt incapable. I didn't think I had what it took to make a good teacher or to be a good wife.  I often asked Will why he married me.  I didn't feel like I deserved someone so good.  (He really is great. I love him!)  Well, student teaching ended and I started to climb up.  We moved out of our dungeon, and I did seem to get better.  I survived pregnancy.  Then I had a baby.  Now, she melts my heart, but those first few months were tough.  I probably cried every day. I felt incapable.  You see your friends and read their blogs and their lives look so perfect.  They can take care of their kids, clean their houses, and make all kinds of cute things and good food.  I didn't find any enjoyment in life.  I had no energy or motivation to do anything. I think I told Will probably every day that I didn't want any more kids.  I didn't understand how people had more than one.  I was done.  I felt fat, ugly, incapable, etc.  I felt everything dark. I couldn't be a good mother.  Luckily Will's work schedule was flexible, which meant he was able to take care of Evelyn when I just couldn't handle life (Don't worry, I didn't neglect Evelyn.  Sometimes I just felt like it was too much to handle and Will was able to help).  However, it got to the point that he was having trouble getting all of his hours in.  Frequently I would just feel overwhelmed and go to bed, regardless of whether it was morning, afternoon, or evening.  Then, one day Will came home in the middle of the day to put Evelyn to sleep for me and to let me shower.  That week in particular I had really been struggling, and he was frequently having to reschedule with his clients.  After he had put Evelyn to bed and I had showered, I was feeling better and told him he could go back to work.  However, he told me that I needed help.  He told me that I needed to see a counselor and to see a doctor about getting on antidepressants.  He had mentioned this before, but he was firm this time.  When he said this to me, especially about the antidepressants, it hurt.  But, he was right.   I realized I needed help.   I wasn't going to get better on my own.  Reading scriptures more or praying wasn't going to help (on a side note, when I was so down, I didn't even have the motivation to read scriptures).  Sadly, this didn't happen until Evelyn was almost 8 months old.  But, we got through it.  She was a great baby, so that helped A LOT!  I'm glad to say that once I started taking anti-depressants I felt better within days.  I have tried to wean myself off, just to see if I could make it on my own, and it is very evident that I still need them.  I'm glad they work, because I have learned that others cannot find help as easily and have to climb out of those dark lonely halls on their own, and that is tough!  Despite the help I have received from medication, I still struggle.  It would be nice if taking a pill would make all of my troubles go away, but it doesn't.  I still struggle to find the motivation to do things.  I still am very critical of myself.  I still struggle to get out of bed.  I'm grateful that Will helps out around the house as much as he does, since many nights after a long day with Evelyn I don't want to make dinner or really do anything.  I know that this is going to be a battle that I'm going to fight all my life.  Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately), studies show that antidepressants alone won't do the trick.  I know that it takes personal effort too.  As Will has now done even more research on this, he tells me that counseling is strongly recommended with antidepressants.  However, I have to admit that my experience with counselors (I've gone to 3 different ones) has been very bad.  So, we'll see what I can find to give me the same things (or at least similar things) to what I could get from counseling (anyone have any good books they suggest?)
So, there you have it.  There is my story told in a few lines.  I love life.  I'm grateful for Evelyn and I'm so ready for lots more kids.

Why would I write all this?  Why would I show my worst self?  This is really hard to do!  It's because I need help from you.  I can fake it.  How many of you knew that I was struggling?  My sister doesn't even know how bad it got.  So, now that you know, I won't be tempted to fake it, but to fight it...  I can learn to be a BRAVE girl!  Also, we all covenanted at baptism to bear one another's burdens.  I appreciate knowing what others struggle with so I can relate with them and try to shoulder the load with them. Now, you know my burden.  Can you help me bear it?  :)

Over Easy

We're here!  We are now Okies!  It's hot...I could probably cook an egg outside, but we love it.  We are almost done moving in.  I'm loving our new place.  Evelyn is too.  She has been crawling around more enthusiastically than she ever did before.  I think she is having fun exploring.  We took her to the pool yesterday, and she loved that.  We're having a good time.  I've been so grateful for all the help we received with this move and just  help in general.  Here is my huge thank you list.

Thank you Shelley Mills for the awesome hair cut
Thank you Cheryl Cline, Tammy Dawson, and Lisa Huber for your help with cleaning the apartment
Thank you Brother Rena, Jake Dawson, Eugene Mariner, and President McIntosh for your help with moving
Thank you Taci and Jake Zollinger for your help with the couches
Thank you Amy for helping me take care of Evelyn
Thank you Jeannine McDonnel for letting my sis and I stay at your place
Thank you Dianne, Jacob, and Michael Whatcott for waiting patiently to meet up with us and for the great breakfast
Thank you Dean and Margaret Taylor for ALL you do!  We love you and couldn't have made it to OK w/o your help.

I truly am blessed.  I really felt the love of the Lord these past few days.  I've thought a lot about Spencer W. Kimballs qoute, "God does notice us, and he watches over us. But it is usually through another person that he meets our needs. Therefore, it is vital that we serve each other."  But,  I have also felt his love in other ways.  We've been trying to down size and sell some things.  It was amazing some of the things that sold and the offers we got on them.   Every little thing worked out perfectly.   It wasn't just a coincidence.  I know that there is a God and that he loves us and cares for us.  I also know that our loved ones who have already finished their test are on the other side helping us out too.  I am grateful for this move and the things it has taught me.  I am so grateful for my WONDERFUL FRIENDS!  LOVE YOU ALL!

Excitement

Warning: I am trying to set a record for using the word "excited" in one post.

In 10 days I will have a new home.  I'M SO EXCITED!  In 12 days, HARRY POTTER comes out!  I'm SO excited.  I just get so giddy when I think about these next few weeks.  This summer is going to be awesome.  Those 2 things are the start to some other AMAZING things that are going to happen, but I'll tell you about them later.  Anyway, one of my best friend is going to be a mom.  I'm so excited for her.  She's going to be the best.  She's amazing.  I LOVE YOU JULIE!  I'm so excited to be 5 hours away from my other best friend...my SIS!

Life is great.  Evelyn is beautiful. I love watching her learn new things and explore.  She's always making me smile.  I love when she gets really excited or when she crawls really fast to see me or Will.  I love how happy she gets when Will gets home.  She claps and it is adorable.

Why I breastfeed

This is more of a reminder for me.  I LOVE BREAST-FEEDING!  I love it!  It was REALLY difficult at first, but I am so glad I am doing something so rewarding for my little one.   I'm not going to lie, I wanted to give up several times, but E was the smart one and refused to take a bottle.  :) I'm glad she's so smart.  (Seriously, though she really is smart.  She's going to be a child prodigy, I'm pretty sure.) :)

Since, I'm not lying (I'm actually sitting up...you've got to love my husband's humor.)  :)  Sorry...like I said before, it's  tough.  It's a very big time commitment on the mother's part, it's painful in the very beginning, and it's not the norm.  Maybe it's my insecurity, but I usually feel really weird when I breastfeed in public.  Those are all the cons I can think of.

Here's my list of pros:

NOTE: I do feed E formula.  I'm not a big fan of pumping, so when we go somewhere or when I make her cereal I use formula.  I'm not hating on formula...I'm just reminding myself of why I still breastfeed...

Why I love breast-feeding
1. It's my cuddle time.  I love holding E close.  I love it when she looks up at me while she eats, and I can stare into her beautiful eye's as she stares into mine.  I know she likes it and feels loved.  The other day I was giving her a bottle of formula and I found myself getting impatient.  I wanted her to take the bottle and hold on to it herself.  (She's getting pretty good at doing that.)  But, when I'm breastfeeding, my time is hers.  It's a great time-out from the world.

2.  The obvious...breast is best!   Have you looked at the ingredients in formula?  In 3 of the formula's I have, the first ingredient is Corn syrup.  One of them has the second ingredient listed as SUGAR! YUCK!  (Maybe that's why our kids have so many health problems...)

3.  My little one hasn't been sick yet.  We've gone through flu season, and Will and I both have been sick several times, and E has had hardly any problems. (She got stuffy once, and a runny nose a few times.)

4. It's FREE!!!!  Have you looked at how much a can of formula costs?  For 15 bottles, it costs $13!

5.  No clean up...and I hate doing dishes...

6.  If some big disaster happened & the grocery stores were empty, I would still have a way to feed E.  Yeah, I could stock up, but food storage for Will & I is tough enough...

Well,  here's another random post about something that has been tough, but so wonderful.  Hope you enjoyed.

The Power of the Mind

Just some random thoughts about birth and the mind...

I recently reminded myself that what we perceive is hard becomes hard.  I was doing something strenuous the other day.  I was tired and ready to give up, then I told myself...hey...I gave birth without any interventions, if I can do that, I can do anything.   I had a new bout of energy and the task at hand was more enjoyable.

When I was studying up on giving birth, before E was born, I came a cross several books that discussed how women have come to believe birth is hard because everyone says it is.  They cited examples of women in other counties who give birth easily and get back to work.  I decided to test this theory and used Hypnobabies to help train me.  I wasn't the greatest student, so yes, labor was hard...one of the hardest things I have ever done.  But, I learned a lot about myself and that I can do hard things. It's SO empowering.   I wish more people choose to go this route...but whatever.  (It's great being in control, as well. )

The mind is SO powerful!  I have become lazy in allowing it to grow, I'll admit.  I haven't fasted in awhile,  (I'm still breastfeeding and for my milk supply to keep up with E I need food)  but that was one of the things I loved about fasting.  It helped remind me that my mind was in control.  I think we need those reminders.  We have so much potential, but a lot of times we let our body or our negative thoughts get in the way.  I hope I can do better and remember how strong, powerful, and capable I am.  YOU ARE TOO!

The Truths about Parenting PART 1

*I must start with a warning so to say.  There are many different views on parenting.  This post is about mine.  I'm not wanting anyone to get offended, I'm just venting...

Truth #1: Parenting is tough!
Do we ever admit this?  I'm quilty of being one of those moms who always post the cutest pictures and videos and always talks so positively about my responsibilites as a stay at home mom.  I, mean, E is awfully cute.  Right now she's on her tummy in the living room looking at the big overstuffed chair saying "hi"  (more like..haui) over and over.  But, she's not always happy.  She cries and tries my patience.  So why do I always try and convice people that I am SO happy that I stay at home w/ E?  Well, part of it is because I am...usually.  Also, for me, personally, I feel like I have to prove myself.  This probably isn't the best thing.  BUT, in our society, stay at home moms are not looked at in positive ways.  I have to remind myself OFTEN that what I'm doing is more important than bringing in an extra couple thousands of dollars a month.  We survive on one (small) paycheck, and we don't have any debt.  Yeah, we have a hand me down table, no tv and cable, and used couches that I don't particularly like, but my happiness doesn't come from those things. 

I'll admit that there ARE times when I look at the world and wonder if this is so right why do "they" look happier?  Again, I have to remind myself OFTEN that what I am doing is making a difference.  There is so much darkness in the world right now.  The world needs BETTER parents.  (You do not have to be a stay at home mom to be a better parent by the way.  I have several AWESOME friends who have to work.  That's not what I'm saying.)  With Will's job, we've seen how important parenting is.  I wish more children could have a MOM & DAD who LOVE each other and who are ready to be parents.  There are TOO many 17 year old moms!  It's almost normal!  YIKES!  I'm so glad that I can stay at home with Evelyn and let her know that she is loved and cared for.  I'm glad that I can be the one to teach her values and standards and not some government program. 

So, there you have it...parenting is tough!  Not just because I have no clue what I'm doing and because I don't know how to always make E stop crying, but because the world has made it tough! 

Now you mom's out there, what have you done to make it easier?  What has helped you feel that what you are doing is the Lord's will?

True Love

So here's a fun video of our little princess and her prince charming.  The prince is 18 months.  His parents are our besties.  We've pretty much planned our children's marriage.  :)  I was watching the prince a few days ago, and the princess just loved him.  She kept giggling at him.  I finally pulled out the camera after she died down a little.  Enjoy!

March Madness

Well hello April & spring & moving & planning &poopy diapers.  What's that?  Yes, I said poopy diapers.  This last week, we've had to give the princess 3 unscheduled baths because she has made some serious messes.  Yet, she still is my favorite little person in the whole wide world.  I love her little eyes.  I love it when she looks up at me when I'm feeding her.  She stares straight into mine.  It's beautiful.  She's starting to be quite the chatter box.  We can't go to anywhere w/ her. :) (Mostly because she's so cute I'm worried some one will steal her...) Today during conference (we like to go to a church and listen to conference on Sundays) she kept googooing & gagaing.  Will got up like 10 times to take her to the back and distract her.  It usually worked.  Then tonight we went to a Methodist church for an Easter seminar they have been doing.  Same thing...this time I stood in the back with her too.  We sat behind an old lady, and I saw her plug her ear once.  HAHA!  She'll never sit in the back again, I'm sure. 

Conference, what did you think?  What was your favorite talk?  Leave a comment! If you're reading this, you either are Mormon, or know I'm Mormon.  Every 6 months our church has a conference where our prophets, apostles and other church leaders talk.  It's always amazing.  I know the Lord inspires every speaker.  I loved all the talk about dating.  My sister loved it too.  HAHA, so right after priesthood session on Saturday a guy messaged her on fb and asked her to go on a walk w/ her between sessions.  RIGHTEOUS!  Amy couldn't go though...
Will's favorite thing about conference... well he doesn't have a favorite talk...but he liked the overall encouragement and motivation he got to be better.  Don't you love President Uchtdorf?  He's so witty!  I always love Elder Bednar.  He is a serious scholar.  He always has some new principle to share.  I love how he presents his message. 

In other news, if you stalk me on facebook you know that we are moving to OK!  I'm so excited!  You may ask, espeicially if you're JULIE ARDNT, what is so special about OK?  :)Well, for starters, it's pretty close to my family in AR, and not too far from my family in MN.  Secondly, the people are SO nice!  Thirdly, the school is beautiful!  (University of Oklahoma)  Will is going to be studying Industrial/Organizational Psychology. (Most people don't know what this means...basically it's dealing w/ improving the work place through things like training, leadership development, personnel selection, etc....FUN stuff...right.)  Actually, I'm really interested in it.  I hope he focuses on leadership because I'm fascinated w/ stuff like that.  The building Will will be spending most of his time in is beautiful! 

We're so blessed, the program pays for his school and gives him a little extra to live off of.   One of the biggest reasons that I'm excited for this move, is that we will be there for at least 5 years!  Really, that's not a long time, but when we got married, I had no idea what our future held.  I knew he would graduate in a couple years, but I had no clue where we would be.  I knew we would leave Idaho shortly though.  So, I haven't really gotten comfortable.  Now, I can get a little comfy in OK.  Oh and Norman, where we are going, is such an awesome town!  It's VERY family oriented.  There are lots of parks and an awesome movie theater, and all sorts of fun things to do.  Plus, my great uncle is the CFO for the ampitheater at the Oklahoma City Zoo (30 minutes away) and he gets front row tickets to any show in town.  AWESOME!  Last year Tim Mcgraw came and my cousins and Grandma went.  He sang to my cousin because it was her birthday.  Anyway, I'm excited to get to spend more time w/ my great uncle and possibly see some great shows!  :) 

I'm not excited about moving.  Blah!  Any suggestions?  I've checked out 3 books from the library.  I'm such a nerd, now hold on (before Julie makes fun of me...)  I didn't say I was enjoying reading them.  I have learned some things though.

Speaking of books, has anyone else read The Hunger Games or The Great & Terrible series?  I've just started Mockingjay.  I didn't like them at first, but I was told to keep reading, so I did.  I'm not a big fan of authors shouting out political messages, but it's not that bad.  I really liked the second one.

I started reading the Great & Terrible books on my own.  My friend Courtney let me borrow her book.  I had it for over a year and finally decided to read it. It was so good!  I got the next one from the library and then Will bought me the whole series for Valentines Day!  YAY!  We're listening to them together now.  (The library has them on CD.)  READ THEM!  They are about the second coming and SO interesting.   (Fiction...but insightful) Well, I'll keep you updated on our exciting new adventures.  Leave some love!

Here's little E doing her thing...I tried to keep it pg rated, but she has this grabbing complex...
Before I took this video, she was just having a ball in the tub.  Of course, as soon as I pulled out the camera she died down.  This still kind of shows how relaxed she was, but seriously her legs were slumped over the side and she was just chilling...

Being in Love and Marriage

Will and I love C.S. Lewis for so many different reasons.  He has so many good things to say.  Here's one:


Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling... Knowledge can last, principles can last, habits can last; but feelings come and go... But, of course, ceasing to be "in love" need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense — love as distinct from "being in love" — is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriage) the grace which both partners ask, and receive, from God... "Being in love" first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it. (Mere Christianity)


Isn't that beautiful?  I remember the feelings of love Will and I had when we were first dating.  It was magical.  However, after two and a half years of marriage, those feelings aren't as rampant as they were.  I still get giddy, but the twitterpation I felt 2 years ago is gone.  Now, we are learning to love.  It is even more magical.  :)  


I think one thing many people in this world are missing out on is learning to love.  So many people want the feelings that come with love.  Well, those strong emotional feelings come and go, so people move on.  They think, I must not be in love any more.  However, love is more than just feelings, it is like C.S. Lewis said, learning to keep promises and help each other.  As I have been learning to love my husband, I am learning so many other things.  I am learning to be patient and to be less selfish.  I am learning how to listen to others and how to communicate my own feelings.  I am learning much more, and we've just been married for 2 years!  I still have so much to learn!  It's great!  


Marriage is so important because we learn to love.  There is no greater thing to learn because like I mentioned, you learn so many other things!  That is why it is so important to strive to keep your marriage strong.  It can be hard, but something so magical and amazing should be hard!  Is our society turning into a bunch of wimps where they can't learn to love?  People don't want to get married and make the greatest promise they could ever make.  Others succumb to the hardships of keeping their promises.  I know that Will and I can and will commit to each other!  We will learn how to love and keep the promise of fidelity that we have made.  I love you Will!  


Enjoy this clip from Bambi about twitterpation.  :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUI-ivE6iGE

My Birth Story

October 13, 2010  (I've been meaning to post this.)

She’s here!  E was born on October 12 at 6:40am.  It was intense.  Before I say anything about her birth, I need to start from the beginning.  This whole experience has been amazing.  I know the Lord has played a role in it from day one.  Will and I had been trying to get pregnant.  After a few months of trying, I said that we probably wouldn’t get pregnant until Amy came home.  When I found out I was pregnant, we calculated the “due” date.  (I’m not a fan of that word.) It was 3 days before Amy was scheduled to get home.  (I didn’t know at this time that most first time mom’s have their babies late either…)  Anyway, the Lord knew that I needed Amy.  

Now, nine months later: Monday afternoon, I had a prenatal appointment.  We decided to do an internal exam since I was now 40 weeks.  Karen checked me, and I was almost a 2 and 90% effaced.  I have the mindset that dilation really tells you nothing and apparently that’s true.  I thought after that appointment that it would still be a few more days.  That night we had an FHE group come over as we were sitting down for dinner. (There was a miscommunication with time.) One of the apartments kept giving us a hard time about having the baby.  They wanted to be there.  

Anyway, they left, and Will and I ate dinner. Afterwards, Will was going to type up some notes for work.  I tried to lie down on the couch.  I couldn’t get comfortable, but that wasn’t anything new.  I decided to go into the bedroom.  Soon afterwards, around midnight, I started having some contractions that felt different.  They didn’t feel like the ones I’d been having, and they were coming pretty frequently.  I told Will that I didn’t think I’d be able to sleep, and he said he wouldn’t be able to either.  We knew this meant she was coming soon...we didn't realize how soon.  

So, we decided to watch a movie (Runaway Jury).  I began to wonder if today was the day.  I told myself maybe tomorrow, but after the contractions kept coming, I began to see the light.  I didn’t think she’d come the day Amy was coming into the states.  That’s too much excitement in one day.  Anyway, I decided I should check and see how close together these contractions were, since they seemed pretty frequent.  As we watched the movie, I would tell Will when a new one started, and he’d write it down.  An hour passed and they were all 3-5 minutes apart.  By this time, (1:30) it was getting hard to stay comfortable, so I decided to take a bath.  That didn’t work that well, so I tried taking a shower.  That worked better, but it was still hard to stay relaxed.  I was having some pretty bad back pain.  (I’ve had it this whole pregnancy, but this was worse.)  She was in the perfect position for delivery, so I’m not sure why it hurt so much.)  

Will was a little nervous, I think.  He wanted to help, but I didn’t need him yet.  I told him to do the dishes and then had him run a few quick errands.  I decided I’d better call my midwives and see if they thought I should go up to Rexburg.  I was told to go to the hospital when they were 3-4 min apart, lasting for a minute, and that happening for an hour.  They fit the rule, but I had only been having them for a couple hours.  I was hesitant to go, because I also knew that for most first time moms birthing time can be pretty long.  I had only been having contractions for 2 hours.  How many more hours would I have to go?  Anyway, I called and the phone system wasn’t working, so I eventually called the hospital.  She had me try calling the # again because she was really only supposed to call them when I checked in.  She said if I couldn’t get through she’d call them though.  After a few more minutes, I called her back and had her call the midwife.  We decided we would go up though.  (I was GBS positive, so I didn’t want to risk not getting the penicillin in time.)  Will gave me a blessing and then off we went.  

As each contraction hit, I tried to relax and breathe through it.  I thought the car ride would be pretty bad, but it wasn’t.  It went fast too, but that was because Will was speeding. ( I told him he didn’t have to, again thinking that we were being silly for going already.  My midwife called me on the way there.  I could still talk through most of my contractions, so they weren’t “that bad” yet.  (Compared to later…)  Anyway, she kind of said the same thing I was thinking.  Since we lived in IF and I was GBS positive, she thought it would be wise to come up, but I kind of got the hint that she thought I might be coming too early too.  Anyway, we got there around 3am and did the whole admitting thing.  They checked me, and I was at a 5.  This was the only time they told me what I was dilated to.  (I didn’t get too excited about being at a 5 either.  I thought it could still be quite a few more hours.)  They admitted me and things started getting intense really fast.  

I had prepared for a natural childbirth with the hypnobabies class.  It is a class that teaches you self-relaxation.  I was initially going to go to the classes, but then the instructor had a family emergency and wouldn’t be doing the classes again until October.  She told me to try the home study course.  I had read a lot of birth experiences of people using the hypnobabies method and was really impressed with their stories, so I thought I would try it.  (Many women have had pain-free births…if you don’t believe me, google hypnobabies.) I wasn’t the best student doing it on my own, so looking back now, it would have been better to go to a real class.  I did learn a lot and felt like I was able to handle the pain a lot better, but a lot of what I learned I couldn’t utilize during the last few hours of labor.  

So, while my contractions were intensifying, I tried to relax and think about everything I learned.  It was tough, and I couldn’t get comfortable.  I tried several different positions.  I was excited to birth with the midwives because they are really helpful in suggesting different positions and they have a Jacuzzi room in the hospital that only their patients can use.   I found that the only position that was comfortable was lying on my side with Will rubbing my back pretty hard though.  Sitting on the toilet was ok too.  So, for the next few hours I laid in bed while Will rubbed my back. I drank a lot, so I had to get up and go to the bathroom every now and then.  After a while, I couldn’t concentrate on anything.  Will was the only thing that kept me going.  I love him!  He was such a good coach.  We debated about getting a doula before birth, and it probably would have been great.  I told Will that if we didn’t get one, he would have to be pretty prepared.  He was awesome and did a lot of reading with me.  So, he was strong for me.  I would squeeze his hand for each contraction, and he would encourage me.  I could tell he was a little nervous at first with what to say, especially with the nurse there.  Speaking of nurses, they were amazing!  They followed our birth plan to a T!  They were very supportive.  I loved how they only checked me when I told them I felt like pushing and they only put the monitor on me a few times.  When they did put it on, they held it there instead of wrapping it around my stomach. 

After awhile, my body was getting pretty tired, and soon I felt a lot of pressure down below.  She checked me, but told me to keep waiting. (She didn’t tell me what I was dilated to…  I thought about my Savior and looked to Him for strength.  I also thought about Eve.  (Where E comes from…)  I’m curious to know how her birthing time was.   I think it was a beautiful experience for her.  Tough…yes, but still beautiful.  She didn’t have all these negative portrayals to dwell on like we do.

I began to feel really pushy, and so she checked again and still told me to wait (I think I was fully dilated, they just weren't ready yet. :) ).   They were getting things ready in the room, and Will’s voice began to change (she must have told him that I was almost there or there so, I knew things were progressing.)  Karen, my midwife, came in and told me I could start pushing.  I was so relieved but still had a lot of work to do.  This was probably more intense than the first stage.  I felt a lot of water coming out at one point and thought my water finally broke, but a little later she grabbed a hook to break the water, so I’m not sure what that was.  Will started to get really excited.  He told me he could see her head, so that gave me a new motivation.  Then I started thinking negatively of all the bad stories I’ve heard in regards to pushing.  (People really should stop doing that.)  At any rate, after LOTS of grunting and working with my body she finally came through.  Words can’t describe how I felt.  It was SO tough, but then everything became beautiful!  The hormonal rush that happens right after pushing is amazing.  She was quickly put on my chest.  I was so in love and relieved.  She was very purple and funny looking, but I was in love.  Everything I had just experienced was forgotten.  We rubbed her off and just stared at her.   We waited for the cord to stop pulsing and then Will cut it.  I birthed the placenta sometime in there too.  That was weird.  Then they took her to be weighed.  They thought she swallowed some of the fluid because she was having some trouble breathing, so Will and she went to the NICU to check her.  She was fine.  It turns out I wasn't there for the 3 hours for the medicine to work for the GBS, so we had to stay an extra day to make sure E didn't get it.  I got to the hospital sometime after 3, and Evelyn was born at 6:45.  CRAZY FAST!  

So, this was very long.  If you read it all, congrats!  It wasn’t what I imagined, but it was still a beautiful experience.  I am so grateful for Will and our little girl.  This experience really brought all of us together.  

Birth Story

So, I'm going to add more details soon, but basically it was a beautiful, fast birth.  I started having contractions around midnight; we got to the hospital at 3:00; I started pushing around 6:00; she was born at 6:40. 


I didn't have an epidural.  I couldn't have done it without Will.  He was the best labor coach ever, and I'm so grateful for him.  We have had several friends come to visit and are loving spending time with our beautiful girl. 

Will's account
It all started on Monday night (Oct 11) around 10:30 or so.  Sandy just couldn't get comfortable while we were sitting in the living room..  We went into the bedroom to go to bed, and she started having contractions.  Or perhaps while we were still on the couches she started having contractions.  At any rate, she's been having contractions for weeks now, but these were different.  She decided to time them (if you have contractions 3 minutes apart for an hour you should go to the hospital).  At this point I didn't want to sleep, so we put in a movie and watched while we timed her contractions.  They were indeed about 3 minutes apart and at about 1 minute or so.  She went into the bathroom to see if a shower and bath would make them subside or feel better.  At one point during all this, she made the comment, "I don't think you're going to work tomorrow."  

Well, it started looking more and more likely that the baby was coming.  She told me that I should clean (since I wanted to do something to help), so I did the dishes and such, and then we decided that we were going to go to the hospital.  First, however I went to fill up the car with gas, buy some stuff from Wal-Mart (juice and snacks for during labor, gum so that my breath didn't smell bad while I she was in labor, and treats for the nurses, which it was suggested we do so that they treat us nice) and then I returned the movies to the library (Just so you don't think I'm a horrible person for not taking her to the hospital right away, this last one was at the request of Sandy, since they were due the next day).  Then we drove to Rexburg.  She had trouble getting a hold of her midwife, but we went anyway.  By that time the contractions she was having were essentially driving her to her knees, and I would rub really hard on her lower back to alleviate the pain.  I didn't check what time it was when we left, but suffice it to say that we made it to Rexburg in a bit less than what it usually takes when you drive the speed limit.  When we got to the hospital, they checked her and found out that she was dilated to a 5, so they admitted her.  It was somehwere after 3 when she was admitted.  For the next 3 hours or so she would have a contraction every 3 minutes for about 30 seconds.  During these contractions, I'd hold her hand with one hand, and with the other I would firmly massage her lower back.  At one point she said that she didn't think she could do it.  At first, while the nurse was in there, I didn't really give many words of encouragement because I felt weird encouraging her with the nurse there.  But, by the end, everything I did was say words of encouragement as well as give the massage and hold her hand.  The contractions were getting stronger, and Sandy was in more and more agony.  At one point, I gave her a juice bottle to squeeze to help distract her.  Let's just say it's a good thing that bottle didn't have feelings.  She was really hurting, and really moaning (that's an understatement).  After not too long she was checked by the nurse to see how far she was along.  The nurse told me she was at a 6 (Sandy didn't want to know).  Not too long later she was at a 7.  She started to feel like pushing, but she wasn't completely dialted yet, and the widwife wasn't ready yet.  That was not fun.  She was at a 10 within minutes...it felt like hours though.  When she was at a 10, the nurse didn't tell me right away, but I saw another nurse come in and turn on the heater where new babies are put, which I knew was a good sign that we were getting close.  Then the nurse told Sandy she could start pushing.  This surprised me, because I figured we had a long way to go before she could start pushing, and I didn't think we were going to be anywhere close to the actual birth.  Well, soon thereafter Karen, the nurse midwife, came in and had Sandy start really pushing.  This was at around 6, and at 6:40 the baby came out, after a lot of pushing and intense agony by Sandy.  The feelings I felt in that last 30 minutes ago cannot adequately be put into words.  I wanted so bad to help her in the intense pain she was feeling.  I understand a little better how Heavenly Father must have felt when Christ was suffering the Atonement.  But, when the baby came out, this feeling of joy and just utter amazement came over me.  It was as if I wanted to shout for joy and cry at the same time.  I probably would have cried but I was embarassed to.  It was just so incredible when they pulled this baby out of Sandra.  It was somewhat purple, but turned the right color shortly thereafter.  She was placed on Sandy's chest, and I cut the umbilical cord once it stopped pulsing.  Then they did some tests and took her to the NICU for a little to make sure her lungs were ok, since she wasn't crying quite as much as they would have liked.  She did fine there, so I was able to take her back to Sandra.  Sandra, meanwhile, had been getting stitched up since apparently she tore while giving birth.  She also bled quite a bit, and had a small hemmorage and a bit later had a really low blood pressure (like 64 over 32).  We got her some juice to drink, laid her down and she put on an oxygen mask.  At this point she was looking pretty green/pale.  Her blood pressure went back up, but later when she went to the bathroom she almost passed out and the nurse had to give her smelling salts.  The rest of the day was spent taking some short naps, having people visit, holding the baby and trying to get her to breast feed. 
One thing that I've noticed about being around the baby is the feeling of purity that enshrouds her.  It's hard to accept that we're only here because of evolutionary forces when you hold a baby (sure, evolution may have been the way we were created, but what I mean is it's hard to believe that evolution was a random process ungoverned by a higher power).  The reason I say this is that when I hold Evelyn I can just feel that there's something more there and that she didn't just came about because of the joining of some DNA.  Additionally, being around her just makes me want to be better, which I know President Hinckley taught is a way to recognize the Holy Ghost.  I was thinking tonight as I was swaddling her that our home is a replacement of her heavenly home.  She went from heaven to us, so we've got a lot to match in regards to her previous living arrangements.  


Sandra's Story will be posted soon.

Birth Plan

So, one thing that is was suggested that we do was create a birth plan.  After having created one, we found one online that was a bit more humorous than ours, so we decided to alter ours a bit.  Below is what we submitted to the midwife, which was submitted to the hospital.

We had the best nurses and midwife.  They were very supportive of our preferences and followed them perfectly.  

Birth Preferences for Sandra & Will Taylor

To my Health Care Providers: Thank you for taking the time to work with us and our birth plan. These are our preferences if there are no medical contraindications.  We have prepared for a natural, non-medicated birth using Hypnobabies.  We are writing this birth plan with the belief that every labor and birth is different.  It is our desire to have a safe and happy birth experience.

Environment:
1.    We ask for open communication and complete information.
2.    I would appreciate a minimum of vaginal exams and do not want to be informed of my progress in dilation.  (You may tell my husband.  I suppose you may use words, but ideally so that I do not hear what my progress is I would prefer that you speak via smoke signals using a humidifier, since smoke signals using real smoke may be less than desirable for a hospital environment)
3.    We would prefer a nurse who enjoys working with natural births.  A nurse that knows a lot of good jokes and that can sing and play the ukulele as well as tie balloon animals would be ideal to keep the mood light, but just as long as she enjoys natural births we will be thrilled.
4.    I would like to use:
a.    A birthing ball or the birthing tub or shower to help with labor.  The helicopter from EIRMC may be helpful too, just in case I decide to try skydiving to induce labor.
5.    I would like to have a quiet room and no excess staff.  However, if you decide to invite a group that plays traditional music from the highlands of Bolivia to the hospital for any reason, we waive the request to have a quiet room and would love to be entertained by their enriching sounds for the duration of labor. 
6.    I would like for people entering the room to speak softly, unless there is a fire or an earthquake or if somehow a herd of rabid squirrels get loose in the hospital. If any of these are the case, raised voices will be just fine.
7.    Please keep my door closed during labor.
8.    I would prefer only intermittent monitoring (20 minutes on the monitor each hour).

Pain Relief:
9.    Please do not offer me pain medication or ask me what my level of pain is.
10.    I am prepared to handle pain with the Hypnobabies method.
11.    I want to be able to walk around and move as I wish while in labor.  My husband and I recently watched “Invictus” and have decided to take up rugby.  If labor is progressing slowly we may see if the nurses are up for a friendly pick-up game.
12.    Give me the freedom to change positions as needed in labor and while pushing.  However, if I become delusional in some way and decide that a comfortable position would be a position that you deem strange, such as while standing on my head, feel free to suggest otherwise.


Second Stage of Labor & Delivery:
13.    As long as the baby and I are healthy, I prefer to have no time limits on pushing.  However, we would like to spend Christmas at home, so if you see that labor is taking an extremely long amount of time, you may make some polite pushing suggestions.
14.    I would like to be encouraged to try different positions for labor, including:
a.    Squatting, hands and knees, on the toilet, standing, or whatever feels right.
15.    I prefer to have no episiotomy but am willing to discuss its medical necessity if one should arise.
16.    To help prevent tearing, please apply:
a.    Hot compresses, oil, perineal massage, or encourage proper breathing
17.    It’s important for me to push instinctively.  However, if I do decide that I would like to be informed on when to push, I prefer that you have on staff a very large and demanding drill sergeant to encourage my pushing.  I think he could do a good job of motivating me.

After Birth:
18.    As long as my baby is healthy, place the baby onto my abdomen.
19.    Please do not clamp or cut the umbilical cord until it has stopped pulsing.
20.    Please allow my husband to cut the umbilical cord, unless he has for some reason passed out.  If this is the case, please just lay him comfortably on the floor and ignore him.  However, if he could serve some useful purpose while unconscious, such as holding open a door, feel free to use him as you wish.
21.    I appreciate your patience in waiting for the placenta to detach naturally.  However, my nine month relationship with the placenta has been sufficient for me, and I will not shed any tears at parting with it at this point.  I do not have any desire to consume my placenta in any way, not in a house, not with a mouse… 

Newborn Procedures:
1.    If the baby has any problems, I would like my husband to be present with the baby at all times, if possible.
2.    I would like all newborn procedures to be performed in my presence.
3.    I would like to delay the administration of eye drops and vitamin K until after breastfeeding or bonding has occurred.
4.    I prefer immunizations be postponed to a later time.
5.    Do not offer my baby the following without my consent:
a.    Formula, pacifiers, artificial nipples, sugar water, roast beef, mashed potatoes, chocolate cake (although feel free to offer me the last few items).

In the event of an emergency: If the situation becomes life-threatening for Sandra or our baby, we will of course yield to any request for life-saving intervention, upon the briefest of consultation. 

Cesarean Delivery
1.    If a C-Section is not an emergency, please give us time alone to think about it before asking for our written consent.
2.    My partner is to be present at all times during the c-section, even if he passes out.  If such should be the case, sticking some ice down his pants should do the trick.
3.    Ideally, I would like to remain conscious during the procedure.
4.    I would like the baby to be shown to me immediately after it's born.
5.    I would like to have contact with the baby as soon as it is possible in the delivery room.
6.    I prefer to have a hand free to touch the baby.
Recovery:
1.    If my baby is healthy, I would like to hold my baby and nurse it immediately in recovery.
2.    As long as my baby is healthy, I would like my partner to be the baby's constant source of attention until I am free to bond with it (i.e., holding, skin-to-skin contact,  telling her lame jokes, etc.).

She's here!

Evelyn Jolene Taylor was born this morning at 6:40.  She weighed 6 lbs 10 oz, and is 19 inches long.  More details will follow.

Baby News

Well, there isn't much to report.  She's late.  I'm not surprised.  I'm quite happy about it.  I'll start worrying  next week.  If my calculations are correct though, she has another week to go.  I'm not choosing to be induced unless I have to.  The midwives don't force you to induce until your 41 weeks and 6 days.  I doubt I'll get that far, but that's how far I can go.  Everything was fine at my appointment today.  I'm still measuring small.  I measured at a 35 again.  The baby's heart was beating...that's a relief!  :) I've gained 26 pounds.  So, things are just great.

Well, tonight for FHE we had 25 people in our apartment.  There were 2 FHE groups from the singles ward that came, so 4 apartments.  It was fun.  I made bread for the desert, and we played Psychologist.  Well, I didn't play because I was finishing up the bread.  I'm sure going to miss the singles ward.  I probably won't go as much after our baby comes.  We went on a group date last Friday with a few people from the ward.  I had a lot of fun.  On Sunday in ward council, they were joking about me going into labor.  I had called Will while he was in the meeting to see if he had some papers for the temple prep class I was teaching.  He answered...(just in case I was in labor..)  As he left the room, they all got excited.  Bishop said if I went into labor they'd cancel church and convoy to the hospital...funny...
During Sacrament meeting, there was a lot of extra time, so Bishop had me bear my testimony.  My hormones got the better of me.